Saturday, 17 September 2011

When they move on...

He calls you, he ignores you, he loves you, and he hates you. Despite everything, each time he calls, your heart skips a beat and though you’ve convinced yourself you’re moving on and getting over him, those butterflies return.

Again that line is being reeled in and all your hard work is undone when you’re hooked on his every word. And though you hate to admit to yourself, the fact he is still pursuing you gives you a warm glow inside- a smugness that keeps a twinkle in your eye.

But what happens when one day it stops? No daily texts or calls- just silence? Suddenly, you aren’t his world and the person you spoke to everyday becomes as distant as strangers on the street. One day goes by, two days, three… on the fifth day temptation takes over and the promise you made of no contact has been broken.

On the other end of the line is no longer a sobbing mess that greeted you a week earlier. A cold uninterested blasé voice has taken its place instead with the words you have been dreading to hear.

“I’ve been with so many girls this week I’ve lost count. You were right, this is a good idea.”

The taste of vomit in your mouth makes you heave, a sinking feeling fills the pit of your stomach. Hanging up the phone a loud dry sob erupts from the depths of your chest. An unimaginable pain shivers through your whole body.
This is what it feels like to hit rock bottom. When you thought you couldn’t sink any further, hearing of your ex partner with someone else is like a knife through the heart.

This was my turning point. I could not hurt anymore and allow someone to make me feel this way. After hearing his comment I decided it was time for me to cut the line and release the hook for good and get on with my life. I deleted his phone number, pictures of us together, threw away the notes, letters and presents he once gave me. I wanted to completely eradicate the past and the pain.

Obviously there were a lot of tears, but after that day I chose the mature approach to see this as my chance to truly live my own life and make up for the time I had missed out on. I wished him well and contact was ceased once again.

That was until it was my turn to move on…

Remember the glass is always half full…

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