Friday, 16 September 2011

Why Do We Go Back? (or at least consider it...)

I’m moving on with my life, I’m having fun with friends and along the way I’m meeting new and interesting people. So why on earth am i thinking about giving him a second chance? This is the dilemma myself and friends have faced recently and i cannot seem to get my head around it. All the lies, the cheating, and betrayal- yet still I’m pining for the love that i have lost.
However is it the person we miss, or rather the relationship?
This is the problem that i faced. Did i miss my ex and what we had together and how he was? Or was i just craving the intimacy of a special relationship with another. In the first few weeks i was dead set that i missed my ex. Everywhere i turned there were constant reminders of him and the good times that we had shared together. This made me doubt myself and my decision and i slowly began to let him in again- Taking me on picnics, coming round to my house for “catch ups” and just gradually spending more time together. I could feel myself being sucked back into the hole that i had crawled out from, each day he had a tighter grip on me once again. That’s when i realised i missed the relationship not the person. I was sick of being manipulated and found the courage to put a stop to it once and for all.
That did not go down too well. It was all turned around on me, that i had given him false hope and was playing games- when in actual fact i just saw the truth and what was happening to me. Cutting all ties felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I could breathe again and be me. When in the midst of a break up and considering going back, i think the vital question to ask yourself is; do i miss him or the relationship? When you truly know the answer you can get on with your life, but one thing is for sure; no matter how scary your decision may be – you will be ok.
Remember the glass is always half full...

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